Discover more from An Engineering Self-Study
An Inventor's Quest for the NHL Pt. 31
An Emotional Update, as in, an Update on My Emotions
This series follows my attempt to develop a product that I dream of getting into the elite levels of hockey. Previously on the Quest: Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5, Part 6, Part 7, Part 8, Part 9, Part 10, Part 11, Part 12, Part 13, Part 14, Part 15, Part 16, Part 17, Part 18, Part 19, Part 20, Part 21, Concept Launch, Part 22, Part 23, Part 24, Part 25, Part 26, Part 27, Part 28, Part 29, Part 30
During the last few months of 2022, I felt like I was moving through quicksand. The more I tried to push forward on the Uncage, the more I got sucked down into stuck-ness.
And the longer I felt stuck, the more I doubted myself. I had all this opportunity, interest, and support…and I was making nothing of it. I must just be an ideas guy, I thought, someone destined to live with the what-ifs and the what-could-have-beens.
I didn’t really believe in myself, and my motivation tanked as a result. Why work hard when I know it’ll end in disappointment? I tried my best to get back on track – with positive thoughts and Connor McGregorian struts up and down my garage – but everything I did only helped temporarily. I couldn’t get to the root of the issue.
So I went on, self-defeating and self-flagellating, until finally, I realized that my self-doubt was actually, hilariously, just self-importance.
I could see the future. I was beyond the reach of any luck, fate, God, or destiny. How else could I be so sure of my impending failure?
You’d think I’d use this awesome power for good or, at least, for sports betting. But no, my all-seeing third eye was trained only on the outcome of the Uncage.
Since that revelation, I’ve traded in my omniscience for enlightenment and I’ve worked away cheerfully without once worrying about the outcome.
The work is especially cheerful now that I’m shooting 70 mph baseballs at Bob.
Aside from the mental blocks, I realized that the project was suffering from a lack of easy testing. The setups I already had were a little finicky and their correlation to actual shots was a little murky.
Cue Craigslist and two fortuitous finds: a pitching machine and a “BOB” martial arts dummy. These I paired with a golfing practice net and some clothesline to create my best test setup thus far. Repeatable, easy, and fun to use.
Let’s find out where it takes me. Thanks as always for reading,